Squash Casserole Con Doritos

"I’d take her to the border
And teach her to order
Margaritas and fajitas
Senoritas would bring"
If I Could teach my Chihuahua to Sing – Joe Ely

So far it’s been a giddy week for me. I am, of course, elated at the resignation of Alberto “Fredo” Gonzales, (he didn’t say who he wanted to spend more time with, did he?), erstwhile Attorney General and perennial scum sucking toad. (Don’t ask me how I really feel).

And honestly, didn’t you ever wonder why Dubya chose to nickname him after Don Vito Corleone’s hopelessly inept middle son, the one who was dispatched to sleep with the fishes in Lake Tahoe by little brother Al Pacino in “The Godfather, Part II?” Not that there aren’t some similarities. Godfather Fredo was likewise a dim witted habitual liar. He was dominated by women and quite possibly a closeted homosexual too, and by the way, he also ran a brothel. (I’m just saying.)

One of my favorite writers, Nora Ephron, suggests in explanation that when Bush 43 first met Gonzales, he probably thought his first name was Alfredo, and Alberto was just too much of a toady to ever tell him otherwise. I feel comfortable with that.

But I’m not one to hold a grudge. In fact, I’d like to invite Fredo to have lunch with me, when he’s next in California, at a real-deal Mexican restaurant I just learned about, Lilly’s Taqueria in Santa Barbara. No namby-pamby Tex-Mex joint, their little known specialty is Taco de Ojo al Vapor, steamed eyeball tacos, (I hear they taste sort of like egg yolks), and what better dish to enjoy with somebody who wanted all eyes on all Americans all the time. And hey, Turd Blossom and Senator “I’m not gay. I’ve never been gay” Craig from Idaho can join us too.

Really, just how much better could it get? (Of course, there is the “i” word, impeachment, but I don’t want to get greedy or seem ungrateful.) Well, I’ll tell you. When I checked in with my blog and found that two people had read it and made comments (thanks Vashi and mslindac), it was like Christmas, my birthday and chicken mole all rolled into one.

I’m feeling so downright euphoric I want a party, a fiesta, margaritas, mojitos, Dos Equis with thin little slices of lime and tequila sunrises. Hang a piñata, fill it with my civil liberties and pass me a baseball bat. I’m there.

I wish I could share a recipe for guacamole or frijoles or something appropriate, but I don’t do Mexican. And Lilly’s Taqueria won’t give out their recipe for eyeball tacos except to say they steam the entire cow head, remove the eyes, and then sauté them on the grill with a “special” mélange of chilies and spices.

So instead, I’ve been inspired to add a south-of-the-border twist to one of my family’s treasured staples. I call it Squash Casserole con Doritos. It’s an instant classic and will be as at home on the plate next to your burrito as refried beans. This one’s for you, mslindac.


Squash Casserole con Doritos

2 pounds yellow crookneck squash, sliced
1/2 cup chopped onion
4 tablespoons butter or margarine (1/2 stick)
1/2 cup milk
1 egg
1 cup grated cheddar cheese (preferably sharp)
1/2 teaspoon sugar
Salt and pepper to taste
1 cup crushed original Doritos (or other plain tortilla chip)

Saute squash and onion in non-stick skillet in 2 tablespoons of the butter, covered, stirring occasionally, about 10 minutes or until tender. (Alternately you can steam them for about 8 minutes and add all the butter in the next step.)

Mash squash mixture and mix with milk, egg, 1/2 cup of the cheese, salt, pepper and sugar. Pour into a buttered 2-quart casserole dish.

Melt remaining 2 tablespoons butter and toss with crushed taco chips and remaining 1/2 cup cheese. Sprinkle on top of casserole.

Bake at 350 F for 30 minutes or until topping is nicely browned. Eat and enjoy.

Note: My family topped the casserole with crushed saltines or Ritz Crackers. Good, but they're not Doritos.